this is what I see


What It Feels Like to Be a Rare Personality Type


 Oh man, oh man. I don't know why I decided to make the title to this post feel like such a mouthful to say (well, it sort of is a mouthful - I definitely got tired typing it). But this is the title I'm going with because I sincerely do want to talk about my personality type: INFJ. According to 16 Personalities, I make up less than one percent of the population by being an INFJ - T.

To break it down:

  • my mind is 68% introverted
  • energy is 70% intuitive
  • my nature is 66% feeling
  • when it comes to tactics I am 72% judging
  • and my identity is 75% turbulent.

 My specific personality type, according to 16 Personalities, is that yours truly is turbulent, meaning I'm sensitive to stress while also being very success-driven. And my strategy is I'm always seeking constant improvement which actually explains into detail how my work ethic is and how sometimes the teensiest sign of conflict throws me off (not necessarily wrong about that). Though I don't consider myself necessarily success-driven, I am someone who is very goal-oriented when it comes to what I want to accomplish. Unfortunately, sometimes, I get pretty stressed out if I feel like I cannot reach those goals, but I'm always pushing myself towards it.

 One thing I've found very interesting while discovering my personality type (and after taking so many tests, I still come out as an INFJ) is that I approach things differently now and accept how/why certain situations are the way they are. I think the one thing that might bother me about being classified as an INFJ is that people have often mistaken the "introvert" to me being shy. I guess in the past I may have come off as shy when first meeting someone's friend or their friends, but I would now identify that as being reserved and (I'm actually squinting my eyes as I type this) observant of the person I'm about to interact with. There are some instances when people, or even situations for that matter, come easy to me - there's a chemistry and we instantly click or it just happens to feel right at the time. However, I won't deny that there are times where I'm just not feeling it and I'm probably too quiet for most people's comfort.


 As the GIF I so wittingly made (on a whim) states I am a sensitive and creative person. I've written in my blogs before mentioning how I've always been a creative person and I've tied my sensitivity to each project I've worked on (there's always a piece of me in everything I create). I feel as most creatives go, I go about it a little differently (and I've come to notice that this can actually frustrate a few people - whoops). I like telling the joke that I'm impatient in everything else in my life except for when it comes to my artwork. That is partially true. Yes, I do exercise a lot of patience when it comes to learning and applying the process to my artwork, but I do feel impatient in waiting for the result, but I can usually put that out of my mind after a while, which is a really nice trick to do. I am patient in my relationships (romantic or platonic - what a weird word), it just depends on how much we've grown together in our relationship and how much effort the both of us put in it. There is nothing I dislike more than when people assume I must not like them because I'm not as conversational with them as I am with others. I actually do like conversing with people and have no problem initiating conversation, but after a time I will eventually begin to feel burned out (which is another marvelous trait of an INFJ). 

 Still, over time I have managed to adjust and accept the bounds of my personality type. It's sometimes tough being someone who feels everything and will sometimes not have the proper words to express what's going on inside me, but I've learned of healthier ways of expressing myself. Minus the fact that I'm still an emotional person and I get drained of emotions quickly. 

Daniel Reaction.jpg

 Why yes, that studly man you see is my older brother. The truth is, as an introvert, I am often faced with the inner battle of either seeking alone time or to feel a perfect balance of human interaction without overtaxing myself. I am someone who loves to exchange in conversations that inspire me and are worthwhile (and also hilariously funny), but I do love to be alone. It doesn't mean I dislike spending time with people, but sometimes you have to find the right people to be with. Does that make sense? Being who I am is rough, I set high expectations of myself and get discouraged easily if it doesn't result in the outcome I wished for. I'm not saying I'm bratty or anything, but when you really want something to work out and then it doesn't, a little piece inside feels this enormous weight of defeat. But learning more about my personality has helped it make sense and helped me cope in healthier ways.

Life is rough right now, and I have my days where I'm either UP or I'm just really down in the dumps. I'm a mellow person for the most part, and like I said when I'm with people the energy pours out of me and sometimes I like it and sometimes I don't. Being an INFJ doesn't mean I'm shy or I'm always overly emotional, it just means I am someone who is more inclined to relax in the quiet but I am well aware of what I'm feeling. There is truth in accepting yourself, even if I do grow infuriated with certain aspects of myself. All I know is is that this introverted woman loves to spend time with people, dreaming of being creative, actually being creative, and planning for whatever comes next. It's a good feeling.